Freezing time

Sometimes I wish I could just freeze time and not have to worry about anything at all. I could be at a place where I could just rest in God's arms and know that I am his and he is mine. Sometimes I wish life wouldn't change. Sometimes I wish I could be with all of my wonderful at once. The thought that life is going to change and I have no idea what's going to happen, where we're all going to end up, and if we always going to be friends scares me. I love my life the way it looks right now but I have to learn that God's plan is so much bigger than mine. But I'm scared to change, scared to let go, scared to give my life to him. I know if I would just trust in him, I wouldn't have to worry about all these things. I cannot help but think that this is all eventually going to go away when we go up to heaven and it scares me to think that my life is all in God's hands. I'm just me, how do I know what's right for my life? How do I know that if I surrender to God, my life will turn out the way I want it to(still trying to figure it out)? I'm almost at a loss for words which doesn't happen very much but there are so many things that plague my mind. Well no more!!! God has the book to my life and only he can control it. I give everything I have up to you Lord. Fill me up with your spirit, use this life I have to do your work. In the words of a famous holiday that is coming up, BE MINE!!! Be my strength, be my light, be my protection, be my best friend and most of all, be my FATHER! I want to be yours to use. I want people to see your light shining through me every where I go. I want to be your ambassador and not have to worry about what others think of me. This is my life and I will live it to the fullest from here on out. I want your love to be spread throughout this world. I don't want the material possessions of this life to run my life, I want to store my treasures in heaven. I know you put me here for a reason, and I know that it's your will for me to be your servant. You are my father, master, best friend, comforter, and my rock. I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART!! Help me spread that love.